Not Always a Gentleman
by Otaku Kyari
Summary: One Shot: England was always known as a gentleman among the other nations so this meeting was a bit of a shock for all...   Contains: OOC-ness, Crack, Hard to understand accents, Bad Language and more crack for the sake of it xP


**Not always as it seems**

England was well known amongst the other nations for his gentlemanly manner (Except when It came to France, where they would fight and argue with each other, but he wasn't that bad, just called him a "Bloody wanker" and hits him a few times, and honestly France really has it coming). But this next world meeting was going to be a very strange one indeed…

England was sitting in his living room, waiting for a taxi; the world conference was starting in Spain tomorrow evening so he was going off to the airport. A knock on the door came and he got up to answer it, the same thoughts going through his head 'I've always hated these meetings, they seem so pointless, nothing ever gets done, and I'll have to see that damn frog!, *sigh* and I can guarantee America will have some "genius" idea that will cause more trouble then the problem he's trying to solve…' he then opened the door "Ah crap!" He growled as the two figures before him beamed mischievously "Awrite wee brither, lang time nae see" His older brother Scotland said in his booming loud voice "Hello brawd, been to long indeed" Wales smiled beside him. "What the bloody hell are you two doing here, what are you up to?" England groaned, honestly thinking he'd prefer to see that frog France right now, rather then deal with whatever these two were plotting. "Cannae we come an' see ur wee brither? Wa main we be up tae somethin'?" He said in his thick Scottish accent, a troubling twinkle in his eye "I'll only ask one more time, what are you two plotting?" England growled, trying to stay calm and not slip into a broad Norfolk accent he took on when angry (Something only these two had witnessed… and honestly didn't want to witness again… England as a posh twat was hard to deal with, England with a punk attitude and threatening accent was impossible) Wales beamed "We decided we'd be comin' along to yer meetin'". England was about to shout at them when the taxi arrived and the two rushed him inside, not letting him speak.

They arrived in Spain soon enough and were now sitting in their hotel room "You two are _**not**_ going to that meeting, you came to Spain that's bad enough!"." Hawhaw, an' Ah suppose yoo'll be stoppin' th' baith ay us yerself laddie?" Scotland laughed, patting him roughly on the shoulder and winking to Wales, they both wanted to meet the other countries for the first time, now seemed good to them. Wales spoke calmly, clearly trying to get England to agree "I know yer not happy brawd but honestly, we've come here already, no point stopping now right?" England combed his fingers through his hair irritated, knowing full well the only way to stop them was revert to a punk mood, something he was sure he'd be in for the day if he started, so it was completely out of the question. The other two sat on the bed, high fiving each other, they knew they'd won this. "Fine! Come to the damn meeting, but it's extremely boring and I swear if you two-!"."Weel be guid englain" Scotland laughed, jumping up and ruffling his brothers hair, Wales then got up and continued with "Yea, we just wanna see if these things are as bad as we've heard!".

The meeting started the next day and England was not looking forward to it. No one had ever meet his brothers and he would have preferred that it stayed that way. Scotland was rough and always mischievously playful and Wales, though quieter and calmer then him, was just as bad when it came to causing trouble. England felt his stomach knotting at the thought of these two at the meeting. "Your not look to good bruid" Wales grinned at England who glared daggers in his direction and then Scotland then commented to his annoyance " Ur ye boak? we coods gang in yer place" his Brothers fist bumped at this time and then England burst out "Oh no, like I'd let you two represent Britain, no way on this earth!" the other two laughed, loving when they hot him a bit worked up (but not too worked up), it made him seem a bit less uptight. " Alrecht alrecht, waur only yankin' yer chain" Scotland laughed, doing his usual thing and ruffling England's hair, something England dodged away from and sighed exasperatedly. "We'd better get goin' if we wanna get to that meetin'" Wales smiled, pointing towards a wall clock on the wall behind him, they were late.

"Where is England? He is usually one of the first ones here?" Germany sighed, usually happy with his gentlemanly manner and always showing up before time, helping with the meeting. "Didn't hear from Iggy dude yet!" America practically shouted, usually one of the first to meet England because of their brotherly relationship. "I 'ave not 'eared from Angleterre at all" France sighed, always loving to make the gentleman loose his cool, as much as he thought he could, ah but how wrong he was. Anyway at that moment they heard voices growing closer from down the hall and one of them sounded very familiar. "No you bloody twat, why the he'll would you even think that?" England was clearly arguing with someone, which was usually France, who was in the room, so all the nations were watching the door in confusion. " Hawhaw, Ah jist thooght it looked 'at way was is aw!" A loud booming voice said, though not one of them could understand what was said. They heard the loud voice and another laughing and England, now outside the door, grumbling. The door opened a moment later and he walked in, followed by two men, a tall well build man with fiery red hair and another taller then England but not as tall as the other stranger with ginger hair and was dressed quiet similar to England. "Sorry I'm late" England said, turning to Germany "Oh, it's no problem... Who are these two?" Germany asked, not sure what to think of these two strangers. England sighed and gestured towards them "This is Scotland and this is Wales, they insisted on coming here" he grumbled the last part and Germany sighed, knowing full well what it was like to have a brother who insisted on following him to meetings. "I see, well the meetings about to start so if you'll all take a seat" they went to there seats, England sitting in between America and France, his brothers pulling up chairs behind him on either side. The meeting started and Scotland was already bored he sighed, turned to Wales and whispered " Where's aw th' fightin' we'd hear sae much abit? thes is jist borin' " Wales smiled in a bored manner at him and responded "I'm sure nothing happens straight away, you'll just have to wait". America heard these two whispering and looked back at Scotland in fascination, he knew he was speaking English yet he couldn't understand a word he was saying "Ye alright Laddie?" Scotland asked, noticing one of the nations next to England looking at him. America jumped slightly at being addressed and responded quickly "So your Englands brothers?" He was so curious about these two as he had never heard of them before " Och aye laddie, fa ur ye?" Scotland asked with a smile, finally getting to meet another nation. America looked confused and Wales laughed "He said who are you?, I imagine he's pretty hard for you to understand". America then beamed "Oh, I'm the united states of America". Wales and Scotland were unsure of how they were supposed to feel about America, yes him and their brother were like brothers these days but they remember years ago, all the heartache and suffering he had caused for England, for now they're giving him the benefit of the doubt. " Ah America, pleasure tae meit ye, yer a bonnie taa yoong fella" Scotland smiled, giving him a friendly thump on the shoulder, something America was shocked to find kinda hurt, he had confusion written all over his face and Wales laughed again "Haha, he said that it's nice ta meet ya and that your a tall young fella, I find ya amusing myself" America beamed, liking England's brothers and their strange ways.

France then turned around and addressed them both "Ah so you two are Angleterres brothers? I've heard so little about you!" "Who the feck is Angel tire? Wales questioned irritated, not liking this guys voice and mannerisms, Scotland laughed a hearty laugh and thumped his brother on the back " Funay, Ah was jist thinkin' th' sam hin'! ". France blinked at Scotland and then looked at Wales in confusion "How is et you understand zis wild beast but no moi?" he sounded offended, gesturing towards Scotland who sat forward rather threateningly " Whit was 'at?". England found this was the opportune moment to interject "Gentlemen please, if you insist on starting something at least wait until the meeting is over and I'm not around to have to listen to it" he sounded polite but bored, something his brothers found they had in common because these damn meetings were not all they were cracked up to be. "this wee blonde dobber started it!" Scotland growled, glaring daggers at France who remained unfazed. "Yes well, one must get used to France trying to start something" England stated pointedly, making France glare at him, how dare he try be the adult in the situation!. Wales interrupted "Ah, so your France, well I can see why our brother doesn't like you, you're a pompous little bastard aren't ya?" France started to complain when Scotland interrupted "Ah piss aff Frenchie". France turned around and looked back to the front of the meeting, looking angry, and swore in French under his breath, causing England, for the first time in forever, to smile a small menacing smile, something only his brothers saw, causing them both to grin mischievously. How cool it'd be if the gentleman England turned into a punk for the day, not towards them of course, but to the other nations who thought of him as polite. This was their plan, their brother seemed so uptight recently, letting loose would surely calm him a bit. This smile meant they were making progress

A break was called soon after that and England was dragged off to lunch by America, his brothers telling him they'd stay and meet some of the other nations. Now that England was gone it was time to rough up the joint a bit!

They planned to make him snap when he saw everything in chaos and make it look like they weren't involved; it'd be nice it they could somehow make it look like it was Frances fault, that'd teach the slimy bastard. Anyway, they had half an hour to do this and plenty of ways to do it. Plan of action: Get everyone in the meeting really drunk and start some fights. Where to start? Germany.

They walked over to the tall blonde and Scotland smiled menacingly, holding a nice tall glass of beer in his hands " Awrite thaur Germany, braw tae meit ye, caur fur a swally?" Germany looked at the beer and then back up to the tall red head "Oh Uh, I guess I an have one ja, Danke" Wales and Scotland beamed, it only went up from here. France, seeing the German drinking decided to pull out some wine, something Spain and the two Italians couldn't deny! Russia pulled out the vodka and other nations began to drink, after 15 minutes it was time enough to start phase two, start some fights. " Och aye, it's a sham whit France is sayin' abit ye Germany, ye seem loch a stoatin bloke tae me" Scotland said shaking his head dully, laughing on the inside at how well this was going "Why, what is he saying?" the German sounded offended, perfect. Across the room Wales was with France "and the things the German says about you, well, I've not got the mouth to repeat such things" Wales said, snickering slightly, but this was ignored by the tipsy Frenchman "I knew he az been saying things!" France said indignantly glaring over at Germany who glared back, fight one. Next they walked past turkey and Greece, talking loud enough for the two to hear them

"I heard Greece say he could beat Turkey any day of the week"

" Ye don' say? Ah heard Turkey say th' sam hin' abit Greece "

"I wonder whack would win in a fight?"

" Hmm, Ah wonder indeed."

Fight two. After that it was easier and easier, unfortunately their plan had a down side, none of them was on the look out for England, who walked in at a moment when Scotland and Wales were convincing a obviously tipsy China that Japan had been plotting against him.

He looked around the room at the mayhem caused by his brothers and felt his blood pressure rise with the more he saw. France and Germany were fighting on the floor, Spain and Romano arguing while Italy was crying beside them, all three clearly drunk, Turkey and Greece were going at it far worse than usual, Switzerland and Austria were like angry bulls, shouting at each other and Russia, well Russia was rather surprisingly just sitting at the meeting table, watching the mayhem around him in amusement, his young subordinates and sister Belarus staying out of trouble around him as usual. Russia suddenly shuddered, causing his sister and all the others to look at him in confusion, one thing Russia didn't do was shudder, especially in such a warm climate. He was feeling an awful aura that honestly had him frightened, he stopped his childish smile and looked around the room, eyes suddenly stopping on the brit in the doorway, making his open slightly in surprise, those around him following his gaze and freezing up at the sight.

Englands hands were clenched into fists at his sides, his body shaking from anger, his eyes really looked so threatening and dangerous and that evil, maniacal smile that was twitching, enhancing his dark look, he looked as if he was possessed by the devil. " Yow li'tle bas'aards" he growled in a low and threatening voice, losing all gentleman tones and talking in a thick Norfolk accent, staring right at his brothers. Both of them froze in fear and shock, mentally cursing themselves for not keeping an eye out for him. The other nations looked up to see who this new voice was, extremely shocked to see England standing in the door way, looking as dark as satin himself. "Heh, N-Now brother we can explain" Wales stuttered, taking a few step backward, Scotland joining him and muttering " Och shit, thes is bad..." " OI leave yow aloon for a few minu'es, and yure fucked thur plairce up ariddy " he growled, taking a step forward, making anyone in his surrounding area run off to the other side of the room, that aura, that voice, he was not the England any of them knew. " N-naw brither, calm doon, we can gab abit thes. " Scotland said hurriedly, taking another step backwards. Yes they wanted punk England, yes he was a lot cooler like that, but not when it was directed at them, that was just dangerous. "Yow 'wo, aare so fuckin' dead!" England growled, diving at his brothers who just dodged out of his way in time, regretting now letting that monster loose. "B-Brother! Seriously we're sorry! We just-" Wales stammered, jumping again out of Englands way, watching as he and Scotland wrestled on the floor. "Noo thes is somethin' Ah huvnae dain in a while!" Scotland roared excitedly, never getting to get to fight one of his brothers anymore. " OI can'' tairke yow assholes anywhere withou 'his shi' happenin'! OI ken guaaran'y yow 'his'll be thur larst toime yow 'wo come 'o one f 'hese mee'in's " England growled, now pinning Scotland painfully down to the ground, giving him a painful lookig punch and grinning evilly up at his other brother "You next brother!" Before Wales had time to think England had tackled him to the ground, it ending in the same way it did for Scotland, just a lot quicker. France was shocked, he'd fought England plenty of times, he always fought like a lame old man, trying to be a gentleman all the while, that certainly wasn't the case here. "Angleterre I had no idea-!" He started before England stood up and shot a fierce glare at France " Piss orff Frenchie, I've noo toime 'o play wi'h yow 'oday " he spat venomously, causing all the nations to flinch, any drunk sobering up rather quickly. England turned to Germany who jumped slightly and said in the calmest tone he could " I'm afraid I'll hev 'o be leavin' now, My brothers don't look well enough to continue the meeting" Scotland opened up his mouth to protest but England's boot to his gut put a stop to that. "A-Ah yes, of course! The meeting will be postponed for now, it will restart tomorrow at 2pm sharp!" Germany said, finally regaining his normal self and addressing the rest. England dragged his two brothers off and the other nations just stood there, mouth hanging open, unable to process what had just happened. Yes they'd all heard of England's Pirate and Punk days, they just never thought they'd see them. A moment later America ran into the room

"Sorry I'm late! I... What's wrong?" He noticed all the confused and shocked faces of the nations "What'd I miss?"

The next day the meeting started and England was there on time. The other nations looked at him wearily, unsure if it was safe to speak with him or not, even France was awkwardly quiet and nervous beside him. America then ran into the room, just on time, and sat down in his seat, he looked around and then addressed England "Where're your brothers today?"

"Oh they're not feeling well, I don't think they'll be coming down here today" He smirked, something in his grin causing the nations around him to flinch all but America who just continued "Aww that's to bad, They were pretty cool!"

Lol, I had way to much fun writing this xD  
>So there we have it. England is still a dangerous punk on the inside, America is still as oblivious as ever and the other nations will never take England's gentlemen manner for granted again.<p>

I wrote this as a request for two friends of mine. One is Scottish and one is English, they sent me these hilarious translaters to get the Norfolk accent for England and the Scottish on for Scotland xD

Hope you enjoyed reading it a much as I enjoyed writing it! Please R&R!


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